A week ago I read an essay in the NY Times by a man working as a mentor for a teenager at risk for a lot of bad things. The author, Ron Berler, was focusing on academic underachievement and possible gang involvement. Of course, this child could have many other problems.
I've met many boys like this one. For several years I was the psychologist assigned to work with youth involved with juvenile court. Some of them committed very serious crimes. Fortunately, most did not. Many of them came from families beset by numerous challenges. At a time when the economy was fairly stable, many of the parents were unemployed or underemployed. Some parents had substance abuse problems. Some engaged in criminal behavior. Some were just not there. It was easy to become discouraged. What chance did these kids have?
Berler's essay described his teen's lack of motivation to succeed in school, his mother's lack of financial and emotional resources, his father's lack of participation in parenting. His father worked long hours to provide for the family, but he left the discipline to his wife. Even the school system had all but given up.
Berler encountered an incarcerated felon who wanted to help. This person, Orlando Mayorga, was serving a decades-long prison sentence for a crime he committed at age 17. Mayorga has plans for when he gets out; he hopes to become a counselor for at-risk individuals, as he was, as Berler's mentee is. Mayorga encouraged the teen (in a letter) to think not only of himself but also of his loved ones, who will be hurt if the teen is incarcerated, injured or killed. Mayorga's letter may have an impact; it's too soon to tell.
This could wind up as another tale with an unhappy ending. It gives me hope, however. It is a story of two people going in different directions. Orlando Mayorga, whose life got off to such a poor start, looks like he is turning things around, for himself and for others. Ron Berler's young friend seems to be making many poor choices. If Mayorga can change his course after going so far down the wrong road, then it is definitely possible for this teenaged boy to turn things around also.
